When Ash was born, I used disposables.  They where great, easy and not so messy!  But, I am a cheapo and hate spending money when I can save.  That even means mopping my floors by hand so I don’t have to buy a mop.  So, with Ash I had Chinese fold diapers.  For all of you out there, that means you have to fold all of the diapers, they do not come pre-folded.   But, this time around I won’t have to, at least for a while.  I am part of a group called freecycle, and a wonderful young lady had a bunch of Kushies to give away.  Needless to say, I was on it.  I am so excited, not only where they free, but I won’t have to buy any disposables.  I had disposables for night with Ash, so in a sleepy stuper, I wouldn’t pin him.  This lady had four kids, and her youngest just grew out of the small size.  I told to keep my e-mail and I would take any thing else she would toss my way. 

Speaking of cheapo, I may have had some cheap shots in my last post.  I decided to delete it, I was in a foul mood.  With Nate gone at night, and little friends to call, I have a tendency to stew about stuff and the need to let it out.  And to stay up all night with four hours of sleep, so judgement is very impaired.  So, I have decided to get a hand written journal so I can get out what I need to without hurting feelings.  I had talked a little about family and the black cloud effect.  This was very much about very close and very imediant family that I know the whole story about (like people on speed dial) – absolutely no one else.  And I spoke of gift lists, and that is was not about jealously.  Well, it kinda was.  Again, I had some very close family members get things I didn’t feel they deserved.  But I need to remember it is not about them, but me.  Sorry to all, again.  Maybe this hand written journal will help me keep the yapper shut. 

And on another note, speaking of late nights.  I had the absolute poo scared out of me the other day.  I have been crashing on the couch in an effort to keep the heartburn at bay.  At 2:30am, I wake up to a huge crashing sound somewhere in the house.  I do a search, check on Ash and nothing is amiss.  So, I hit the porch light and see about five thirteen year old kids running away.  I think they ice balled the house!  No big deal, I could care less what they do, that is what I have insurance for.  But with Nate’s job, I worry about someone wanting to hurt him and thus hurting us.  Or even someone knowing I am home alone.  I was freaked out, called Nate and started crying.  Needless to say, I slept about two hours that night also.  I think my body is refusing to sleep in preparation of the baby.